As I am currently in the middle of yet another treatment, I would like to take a moment to reflect…
Reading what I post and interacting with me offline, you may think that this cancer journey has been an “easy” one for me. Well, it hasn’t. I just choose not to share the negative aspects on social media or in conversations with others. Instead, I focus on the “positives” – because let’s be honest… who really wants to hear about the bad or difficult times?
So, I don’t.
I don’t share how anxious and nervous I get before every doctor’s appointment, even just regular check ups and blood work appointments.
I don’t share how terrified I am that I may not ever be cured of or from what should be and is known as being a curable disease.
And I especially don’t share how self conscious i’ve become about my looks and appearance with and after every treatment that I get, knowing full well that I am becoming less “picture perfect” than my pre-cancer picture perfect self.
I am well aware that I may be minimizing the daily struggles I and many other young adult cancer surthrivers like me face by not sharing about them. Maybe I should share more. But if I did, would anyone take the time to listen or read, though? Would they even care? Or would they just click the “X” or “Close this browser” while thinking, “oh great, not that cancer girl again”?